Adult ADD: Half-Baked Ideas and ADD

Let’s talk about hinting at things or only telling part of the story. If you have ADD and someone only tells you part of the story, does it drive you nuts? This even comes down to when someone buys a present for you and it’s a secret. If they say, “I just got you a present and I’m going to give it to you for your birthday,” don't you hate that? Do you bug them and bug them, until they tell you what it is?

Or, maybe your friend or partner only has half an idea about something, and they really want to share it with you, and start talking about it. When they say, “I haven’t figured out the rest,” it can really make someone with ADD anxious, right?

One technique to combat this problem, is to explain to your friend or partner how your ADD brain works and how they can help you. Tell them that until they know everything detail about something, not to bring it up. Then, everything will work fine for your ADD and for your relationship. Sometimes, they may even love the idea that they know something you don't, when they start practicing the system, and that's what we're talking about--another ADD-friendly system.

For some linear thinkers, a wrapped gift can sit in front of them and they can look at it every day for a month and just enjoy the anticipation of not knowing what’s inside it. But your ADD brain doesn't work that way. A wrapped gift won't sit in front of you very long because you can't take the idea of not knowing what's inside.

If you’re experiencing that kind of thing where it feels like your world is kind of tipping back and forth because it seems like other people are taking action or causing suspense, can't you just tell them what you need? Tell your non-ADD partner, friends and family how things work for someone with ADD.

For instance, ADD people are usually upset by unanticipated change, people showing up, or gifts showing up and taking their attention off on another tangent. You just have to let your non-ADD partner, family member, or friend understand where you're coming from.

Let's say you set up a very strict system for dealing with books--how you read them, and how you move them from one place to another. Then, one day, your partner comes along and moves the bookshelf. The next day you put your book on the shelf and it falls on the floor because the shelf isn’t there. Wouldn't this be very upsetting for you?

So you scream out, “Where’s the shelf?” Your partner probably looks at you like you're two sheets shy of a ream because it's not that big a deal to him or her, but it is a great big deal to someone with ADD.

Explain that sudden change is very upsetting to you, even though you understand that moving the bookshelf wasn't meant to be mean or to cause angst. And when you calm down, ask your partner, “If you’re going to make a change or you’re going to do something like this, would you please notify me in advance?”

If you feel that the non-ADD people you have relationships with are hinting at things and leaving you in the dark, it can definitely cause paranoia which isn’t enjoyable. Maybe just explaining that, “I like to know everything about things. You can tell me everything about it and I’ll listen and I’ll be able to hear every detail because I like that. If you’re not able to tell me everything about something, don’t hint at it; just wait until you can tell me everything.”

As an ADD person, you have to ask for what you need because linear thinkers don't understand what’s going on in your head as well as you do. You can’t expect non-ADD people just to change because you have a reaction. All that’s going to happen is that reaction is going to cause conflict, so you’ve got to say in words how you would prefer to be approached or how you would prefer things to happen. Just letting other people know how you feel about certain things really makes a HUGE difference.

Article Source: http://www.content.onlypunjab.com

Tellman Knudson, certified Hypnotherapist, is CEO of Overcome Everything, Inc. Stephanie Frank is an internationally known speaker and author of "The Accidental Millionaire." Find out if you have adult ADD. Take the ADD test at www.instantaddsuccess.com/

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