Romancing a Demon - Sex after Prostate Cancer

To address my post-prostatectomy impotence, I used the vacuum system to gain an erection. My engorged penis turned blue and cold. According to the equipment instructions, it can be used for up to thirty minutes. I could, however, answer the question of my urologist, Dr. Ram Rao: "Did you have penetration?" Yes. Not great, but a step forward.

Next came Caverject. There we were in Dr. Rao's pristine office with wall charts and drawings depicting all things urological in living color. Dr. Rao, a trim, handsome man of about 55, a native of India, stood on my left, orchestrating this show. My wife, Lorraine was on my right, her face asking the question "What am I doing here?" On center stage I stood with my limp penis, extended by my left hand, as I awaited the first act.

Dr. Rao described the Caverject system, a clever product from Sweden, consisting of a relative of Cialis, a diluent, and a thin injection needle. He armed the system by mixing the fluid with the drug, dialed in the dose, and handed it to me.

"You want me to inject this where?" I asked. He pointed to the target areas on both sides of my penis, noting that I should avoid the midline where key structures such as veins, an artery, the urethra, and nerves reside.

"Lorraine, you do it," I beg her in quiet desperation.

"No, Bernie it's your job, after all, you are a doctor, and it's your penis."

I did it. Peer pressure at the age of 66. It worked. I had an erection. Not a complete one, but certainly adequate for penetration. And it was pink and warm. Unfortunately, Lorraine had an appointment for a flu shot and we had not made arrangements for a nearby room to put my reawakened tool to the test.

Over the next month we increased the dose slowly until one sunny morning in Islamorada in the Florida Keys, I "shot up" and we enjoyed great sex as I cried, tears streaming off my face and on to Lorraine. Elated, I telephoned my mentor, confidant, fellow physician, and a twelve-year survivor of prostate cancer.

"John, I just used Caverject and we enjoyed fifty-five minutes of penetration." Lorraine shouted from the background, "Not so, John, there was fifty minutes of penetration and five minutes of Bernie walking around the room admiring his erection."

I met and married Lorraine, my second wife, twenty-eight years ago. We were both going through divorce. We often drove to Bar Harbor on Mt. Desert Island, slowly savoring the crisp taste of chilled Chardonnay and awaiting its effect. We would talk, cry, share stories, and cry again. Then we laughed, stopped the car to hug and disrobe as much as we dared. Soon we ran off into a favorite woodland glen, ideal for a hobbit house, where we enjoyed passionate love on a flannel blanket over a bed of soft and aromatic spruce and pine needles. During that year there were a number of startled tourists who will probably never forget that trip to Bah Habba.

Lorraine stayed with me over the decades, long enough to teach me how to take the risks involved in truly loving another. She led me by the hand through the trackless land of love. We became proficient with Tantric sex, maximizing the senses, finding new erogenous zones. I enjoyed multiple orgasms without ejaculation, savoring the climactic experience with its primal scream. Fortunately we lived in a rural area

I became addicted to sex. Sex became my demon.

The ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle noted that the ultimate goal of humankind was for happiness, in Greek,"eudimonia", which means "good demons". Was my demon good or bad or both?

For twelve years I had been on a research study, wherein my lack of "free" PSA (prostatic specific antigen) suggested that I would eventually get prostate cancer. In the interim I changed my diet and added a wide range of vitamins, minerals, and other "nutraceuticals" to stave off or minimize cancer, while I chased my demon.

About two years ago my second prostate biopsy showed definite cancer. As a pathologist I had seen the worst cases, the failures, so I opted for aggressive therapy-- androgen depravation therapy, prostatectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation therapy. The treatment plan is almost over and I have no detectable PSA. A possible cure? Only time will tell.

Our new sexuality may lack spontaneity, for it requires me to arm and inject Caverject, but our sessions together last for well over an hour. Close friends ask us what do we do with so much time for loving? We get out our tattered copy of Kama Sutra from college days and try all the positions.

Article Source: http://www.content.onlypunjab.com

Bernhoff A. Dahl, M.D., pathologist, author, keynote speaker, consultant, humorist and veteran mountaineer, shares his experience with prostate cancer and his efforts to maintain his masculinity and sexuality during and after his 28-month period of maximal therapy. He is currently writing a book about this experience entitled Sex and Prostate Cancer Dr. Dahl is the author of the International Bestseller Optimize Your Life! Visit www.TrionicsUSA.com for details. Contact: Bernhoff Dahl, M.D. www.DrBDahl.com 9 Shore Lane Winterport, ME 04496 DrBDahl@aol.com Phone : 207-223-9998 Cell phone: 207-745-7272

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